Thursday, August 28, 2008


Oh for god's sake the coal cars are back.

No, nevermind.

Shit, there they are!

. . . well they were here yesterday . . .

You wonder if all this business with the boxcars and flatcars and coal cars is making you insane. The siamese boxcar sits like a bloated whale corpse on the tracks--is it dead? You can't tell. It hasn't moved in months but doesn't smell any different so there's no real way to tell. But with it just sitting there doing nothing other things have started doing something.

Like the damn coal cars. Everything started with the coal cars and then they vanished and now they're appearing and vanishing more rapidly like some distorted film strip. You noticed them for the first time as you made your way by the siamese boxcar and toward the efficient path through the wood--there, further down the tracks behind the siamese boxcar, just sitting there as if they'd been there the entire time. But they hadn't been there when you finally came up for air because even though you were focused so much on how damn hot it was you know you'd noticed if those coal cars were back. You notice them now and continue on your way through the wood but when you return you realize the coal cars aren't there anymore.

The train track behind the siamese boxcar is empty of anything but wood and steel and long wild plants and there are no coal cars to be seen. But then the next day they were there again, and they were still there when night fell, but then they left again the next day. This continued irregularly for days at time and you can never remember what days you saw the coal cars or what days you didn't but you know you saw them there regardless.

But they haven't appeared in some time and now you're not sure if they were ever there at all. You never actually approached the coal cars and how can someone be sure something is there without ever approaching it? You don't even know if there was coal inside. So you decide then that the next time the coal cars appear you will approach them and be sure that they are actually there.

Does the siamese boxcar know?